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Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Just Another Train-Ride Home?


There are a few things that I CANNOT travel without. My wallet, my ticket, my phone, my music and/or a book are my primary necessities on a journey. It so happened very recently on an extremely last minute journey back home that I forgot two of these pivotal things – my music and my literature.

And so it came to be that I was sitting at the window in a rather empty train with absolutely nothing to do sharing my seat with an elderly man who did not seem very friendly. After a few minutes of wringing my hand, fixing my hair and reading and re-reading ancient texts in my inbox, I gave up and decided to escape into my last refuge-sleep. I had only just dozed off when another man walked in. Middle-aged with a make-shift French beard and wearing formal clothes, we’ll call him Mr Unemployed. Now, Mr Unemployed starts a conversation with the unfriendly elderly man who in fact turned out to be a politician. So Mr Unemployed and Mr Politician start talking about the roads in Kerala with Mr Politician defending his beloved ruling party in every way possible. Perfect!! And then the tea-vendor comes and they buy two cups for themselves. Nothing abnormal there. Mr Politician says Thank You. Hmm, Mr Polite Politician. Has a ring to it. The vendor leaves and Mr Polite Politician realises that he has been given extra change in return. He gets up immediately, runs after the vendor who is already on the platform and returns what is not his. Mr Polite, Honest Politician! They both finish their tea. Mr.Unemployed promptly throws his cup out the window. Mr Polite, Honest politician decides to wait till the next station, detrains and throws his cup in the dustbin there. A politician who is honest and polite and has a civic sense! Now, I’m impressed!

 And then Cool Student walks in. Faded jeans, a random graphic tee and headphones in his pierced ears. Mr Politician gives him a disapproving look. Mr Unemployed promptly starts a conversation with him too. So it turns out Mr Unemployed was working with something and got laid off during the financial crunch they faced. And after the 15 minute answer he gave to Mr Politician’s query as to what he does now, I figured he just didn’t bother looking for another job. Probably has enough work managing his French beard (which I noticed was dyed black with one strand of white hair left out to add the contrast). Mr Honest Politician detrains and I’m a little disappointed. I direct my attention back to the conversation between Cool Student and Mr.Unemployed. They talk extensively on various subjects of primary importance to every ‘Malayalee’ with Cool Student talking in Manglish (Malayalam with a little bit of heavily accented, grammatically incorrect English thrown in)– only I was just not interested any more.

That’s when Orthodox Pop-in Law walks in. He does a recce of the surroundings, shoots disapproving glances at Cool Student and signals someone waiting behind. In walks, Shy New Wife with Extremely Young Husband. Clad in a burqa that covered every inch of her body except her eyes, she sat next to me coyly as if she was scared to move or talk or show any sign of life whatsoever. I tried desperately to make eye contact with New Wife. Her eyes were fixated on the floor. After a few attempts, she looked at me. The shock in her eyes! She took one look at me in my T-Shirt and tights with my legs propped on the seat, loose hair all over my face and looked down so quickly that I immediately regretted trying to mingle with her. Young Husband, on the other hand, amused me to no extent. He would wait till his father’s eyes shifted from his general direction and then slyly, put his hand on his new wife’s hand, rub his feet against hers or simply look into whatever was visible of her face. It was a scene right out of a cheesy Mallu movie.

Around the same time Cool Student tries to start a conversation with me. “Where are you going?” “What do you do?” “What is your name?”- (runs his hand through his hair Shah Rukh style)-  “Malayalee ano?” Disheartened by the one-word replies, half-hearted nods and grunts he gets in return, he gives up.

 A while later, my station arrives. As I get out of the train to meet my brother and a few cousins, I realise that the journey didn’t seem so long after all. I guess our peculiar fellow-humans are the best entertainment available to us. Each different, each new. For what can a Sherlock or a Bourne do that Cool Student can’t! 

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