MEET THE RELATIVES...

This is an excerpt from a normal conversation I would have with a long-lost relative if I happen to run into him/her at some family event.

Relative 1 : Look at you! (turns to Relative no.2) She’s become taller than her mother now!

Me : (with a weak smile) Yes, uhmm..

Relative 1 : Oh my, you do recognise me don’t you? I was there at your 5^th birthday party!

Me : (looking around for mom) Oh yes, I do! How can I forget? (very broad smile)

Relative 2 : (with an evil smirk) Really? Tell us who we are then.

Me : (finding mom) Mom! Look who I met!

Mom : Oh, why its… (spills the beans on the relatives’ secret identity). You do know them, don’t you?

Me : Of course, mom. They were at my 5^th birthday party! (tries to make an escape. Fails miserably)

Relative 1 : So what do you do now?

Me : Oh, I finished my first year of Architecture at Manipal.

Relative 1 : So grown up! (smiles) I’ve heard so much about Manipal. How do you find the place? (raised eyebrow, expectant look)

Relative 2 : Architecture? I have an uncle whose wife’s brother’s neighbour’s son is doing Architecture. Very nice boy. What is the course about anyway?

Me : (confidently) Oh,it basically deals with designing buildings and all that.

Relative  2 : You mean, draw plans for houses? Well, in our days you see, the mason and carpenter did all of that. Now they have a degree for it! (laughs tauntingly and looks at Relative 1, who promptly joins in)

Me : (grudgingly) Its not that easy really.

Relative 1 : How difficult can it be? (without waiting for an answer) It’s a five year course, like medicine. (with a concerned look) You’ll be quite old when you get out of college. Then you have to find a job, find your footing. It’ll be difficult to find a nice boy when you become that old. (turns to Relative 2)

Relative 2 : Yes, indeed! (turns to mom) You know that boy I mentioned earlier? He’s about her age. You should try casting your net and roping him in early! (winks in my direction)

Me : (I bet he isn’t a fish) Haha. (glares at mom)

Relative 1 : (turning to mom) It’ll only be a few years before she’ll have found her own boy (points finger in my direction). Don’t do that my child. You’re there to study, remember. (turns to mom) Did you hear about Govinds daughter? Such a nice man and his daughter decides to fall in love! Exactly why todays children……

(Quick escape. A moment of relief. And then I bump into the next long-lost relative)


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